Of Autumn Leaves, Quaffles, and First Chances
by macawtopia
Summary: Lily was minding her own buisness and doing some NEWT review, when James decided to ask her out. Again. Only, he hadn't asked her since the year before, and this time, Lily was entirely unprepared for him. Did she actually give him a chance? No. But…


Alright, this is just a oneshot which takes place in Lily and James' last year at Hogwarts. If you've ever read my other Lily and James story, 'Hey Diddle Diddle', I want you to know that this story is _very_ different from that one. Please R&R though =]

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Absorbed as Lily had been in the NEWT essay she had been revising that day, she couldn't help but hear the crunch of footsteps in autumn leaves, approaching her bench in the courtyard.

The steps seemed to slow as they neared her, as if hesitating, and then she heard the inevitable, "Er, Evans?"

With a quiet sigh she put down her quill, and looked up into the determined face of James Potter.

Now, she'd known that this was coming; it was nearly November and James hadn't asked her out once, but that didn't make it any less unwelcome. Besides, in the interim James had made up for his lack of date invitations by staring at her longingly during class and attempting to impress her with his uncharacteristic studiousness. Still, Lily supposed that this year had gone far better than the one before..._ that_ had been a right nightmare. The boy had asked her out at least once every two weeks, not to mention his shameless flirting.

Lily's friends kept on saying that she was mad for repeatedly turning him down, and that they would make an adorable couple, but the truth was…Lily just wasn't interested. She didn't _want_ a boyfriend, and if she got one, she just didn't want it to be James:

Although she knew that he meant well, she also knew that if they got together he'd no doubt parade around with her, making her the center of attention. The center of gossip and jealousy. In other words, she'd be popular, and that was something she had always dreaded. She preferred the quiet of having few friends, but good friends.

And then, she knew that James himself would probably want nothing more than to snog her in front of the world, while his friends (Sirius) hooted and made crude jokes. Then they'd expect her to join in their conversations like other girls did; gush with them about Quidditch, hip music, pranks they'd pulled and how pathetic the teachers were.

But Lily knew that she couldn't do that. She couldn't partake in conversations about 'cool' topics and pretend that she was interested. Deep down, she was a quiet, studious and naïve bookworm, whereas James was the handsome, charming and admired Quidditch hero. Much as he claimed to like her, she knew that if they got together, they'd both be miserable.

Which was why she dreaded his next words with all her heart.

"Do you want to go with me to the next Hogsmeade visit?"

His tone was soft, and his expression was hopeful, but Lily couldn't say yes.

"Sorry, Potter, but no."

She tried to be a lot kinder in her refusal than she had been the years before, because he looked in earnest. Of course, the idiot saw her quiet refusal as a sign that she might be giving in, so he continued with a small smile touching his features, "Aw, come on, Evans, just give me _one_ chance! Just go out with me _once_, and I'll never ask you again."

Now Lily was getting irritated. "No means _no_, Potter" she said, narrowing her eyes at him, "now leave me alone!"

"But Evans, if you–"

"Please, Potter, just stop bothering me! It's been _three years_. _Three!_" Lily growled, "I've tried being nice, I've tried ignoring you, but you just won't stop! Are you honestly _desperate_ enough that you'll keep on trying after this? Just _get bloody __**LOST**__!_"

Lily felt her cheeks burn with anger, and she became concious that she had been shouting. Realizing that she'd been far harsher than she'd intended to be, she took a deep breath to calm herself, and looked back at James.

And she was absolutely floored by what she saw.

He looked completely crestfallen; crumpled and stepped on as the dead leaves he was standing on. Lily had never seen the invincible and arrogant guy look more vulnerable. But what really stunned Lily was his eyes; try as he might to hide it, they held tears.

Then, in a steady, yet completely broken voice, he said, "Alright Evans. I'll get lost."

He turned around and left without another word, and Lily didn't follow him. She stayed right where she was. In fact, she stayed there for the next three and a half hours.

She just sat on the bench, completely neglecting her half revised essay, and listened as the short scene she'd just been a part of replayed over and over in her head. It was a broken record player, reminding her again and again and again that she'd been heartless and cruel.

She'd called him desperate. Told him to get bloody lost. She may as well have slapped him. Merlin, what had she _done_? She'd been a cold hearted _witch_, and all he'd done was love her.

Because she could tell from the way he'd just looked at her, that he didn't just want to go out with her for bragging rights; he _loved her_.

Sighing, Lily realized that she'd probably just broken James' heart, and that she'd have to apologize to him. And soon.

_Later, in James' dorm…_

_Thunk_

_Thunk_

As James lay on his back, tossing his Quaffle up and catching it with loud _Thunks_, he idly wondered how he had become so very pathetic.

He had almost

_Thunk_

Cried

_Thunk_

In front of

_Thunk_

And because of

_Thunk_

A ruddy girl. If Sirius found out, James knew that he could kiss his dignity goodbye.

Speaking of girls, James realized with a jolt that there was a girl's voice calling him from outside the room. "James! James! Open up, will you?"

Recognizing the voice as Lily Evans, James got up quickly and tossed his Quaffle aside. He hurriedly opened the door, and let her in, waiting to hear what she had to say.

When she remained silent, he frowned at her."Well, what is it? Have I not gotten lost thoroughly enough for you? Because if you'd like me to leave the country, I'm going to have to disappoint you; mum'd kill me if she found out I didn't graduate. And if she found out that you were the reason, she'd probably kill you too."

Lily couldn't help but laugh at how serious he looked, and James gave himself a mental high five.

Then, remembering herself, Lily cleared her throat and spoke, "Look, I just wanted to apologize for being so rude earlier today, I –"

James raised a hand to cut her off, "No, it wasn't your fault; you were probably right. About everything. And I'll... I'll stop bothering you from now on, I promise."

Only half listening, Lily continued, "What I was trying to say, was that I…wait…_what_ did you just say?"

"You were probably right?" James asked, looking unsure of himself.

"No" Lily shook her head, "the other part."

"I'll stop bothering you from now on?"

Lily froze, and realized what that would mean. "But... I thought you loved me?"

"What?"

"I thought you loved me." Lily repeated.

James simply stared at her in disbelief. Then he seemed to snap out of it, and exclaimed, "Of course I do!" throwing his hands up exasperatedly, "That's why I'm listening to you and leaving you alone!"

"But if you _truly_ loved me, you wouldn't give up on me!" Lily protested, "You'd keep on _trying_."

It was only after she said this that Lily realized what was coming out of her mouth. Did she really _want_ him to ask her out again? A quiet little voice in her head said that she did: If he didn't then she would never have the chance to say yes.

James looked completely baffled, "But…you…said…"

Lily groaned loudly; _why_ was the idiot taking so long to realize that she was giving him a chance? "Never _mind_ what I said! _Are_ you going to ask me out again?"

A mystified James managed to stammer out, "Er, if you…want me to?"

"Well get on with it then!"

James, who looked more than a little worried about Lily's mental health by now, gulped and asked, "Er… d'you wanna go out with me?"

"YES!"

"Oh."

For a moment, as James looked at her in disbelief, Lily wondered if she'd made the right decision in giving him a chance.

Then, that wildly happy grin broke out on his face, and she knew that she loved him back. In fact, a part of her always had; she'd just been too afraid to give James a try.

Lily had been about to tell him this, when he threw his arms around her and held her tightly in the fiercest hug she'd ever been given. Then he lifted her off her feet and spun around the room with her, laughing uncontrollably all the while.

At first, Lily was too stunned to make a sound, then she threw back her head and laughed with him, just enjoying the feel of being in his arms.

And when he put her down and opened his mouth to tell her he loved her, and explain why he was so thrilled to be with her, she cut him off by grabbing his collar in her fists, pulling his face towards hers and kissing him warmly. Because really, the fervent and insistent way he kissed her back expressed his feelings better than words ever could.


End file.
